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The family is not a democracy. Not your son the king

The family is not a democracy. Not your son the king


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Democracy? Or hierarchical system with king and queen? Many parents choose to give their children more weight and freedom. They prefer a democratic system in the family. In this way, everything is done according to consensus. Although in the end, of course, they end up choosing the children ... Forget it: the family is not a democracy.

The famous Granada juvenile judge Emilio Calatayud, once again warns about this growing 'educational fashion' in families: democracy. It consists of consulting with the children what they want to do. But if we ask the children everything they want to do, democracy will give way to tyranny. Imagine who the tyrant will be.

This is the document that the Granada Juvenile Judge, Emilio Calatayud, has left on the blog in which he writes. It serves to make us all reflect. Read carefully:

Well ... there are two aspects of education among parents: those who consider that their children have the same rights as other members of the family to have an opinion about everything ... and those who try to maintain a hierarchy within the family, with their king, their queen ... and well, the children are not servants, but the children of the king and queen, who one day, yes, will be able to become monarchs.

Judge Calatayud warns about the "growing fashion" of letting children choose everything, absolutely everything. They are the ones who decide what they want to play, what movie they want to see, what they want to eat, have a snack and dinner ... They choose if they stay at home or prefer to go out ... And in the end, those little ones, supposedly democratic, overnight they become the tyrants of a new system, where parents are, yes, their servants. And all because one day they forgot that there are non-negotiable things.

Judge Calatayud's attitude is not to tie hands and feet to children, or to put a gag on them. Rather remember that parents should exercise some authoritarian power at home, that it is they, and not their children, who decide, because until their children grow up, they are the people who guide them, the references for their children.

If children are made with that power from a young age ... what will happen when they grow up? You may come across one of these cases:

1. They will treat their parents like servants. They will think that they are the ones who rule and their parents, the ones who obey.

2. They can become tyrants. In the long run, they have a good chance of becoming dictators within their own family.

3. They will not know how to tolerate frustration. If they grew up thinking that everything was done as they pleased, what will happen when one day things don't go as expected? You won't know what frustration is and you won't know how to cope with it.

4. Tthey will have behavior problems. Obviously, feeling powerful will make them more arrogant and treat others as they treated their parents in their day.

5. They will not know how to negotiate or resolve conflicts. If during their childhood everything was a Yes and they could express their opinions and choose absolutely everything, they will not have exercised that negotiating capacity that could be so useful to them.

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