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Sometimes it is unavoidable. Nerves can and we end up yelling (too much) at our kids. Then we regret it, but of course, it is too late. The screams glide through the home in the form of little thorns that pierce his heart and ours.
We know, yelling sometimes frees us from tension, but they are not useful to educate. We do not get anything constructive with them. But it is difficult to avoid them when they put us to the test so many times ... However, there is a fantastic method to calm our nerves. We explain what the orange rhino technique consists of to avoid yelling at our children.
The creator of this orange rhinoceros technique is, how could it be otherwise, a mother. Specifically, it is about an American mother who prefers to remain anonymous (to protect the privacy of her children). What we do know is that she has four children (2, 3, 5 and 6 years old), and that, tired of yelling at her children, she decided to find a solution. And he found it. She created a blog to share her experience with other mothers and fathers: 'The Orange Rhino Challenge'. Their challenge was simple: stop yelling at their children for 365 days. (A whole year!). He has not yelled at them for more than 500 days ... How did he do it? Here are the tips of the 'orange rhinoceros' to get the challenge of not yelling at the children:
1. Get away from the problem for a few seconds. When they are in full fight with the children and you really want to yell at them, you should move away for a few seconds, leave the room. As you walk away, you shake your body (this physical gesture also helps to 'shake' emotions of rage and anger).
2. Close your eyes to escape. Another of the proposals of this mother is to close her eyes tightly and think of a place where we can find peace: a beach, a garden, a mountain ... The objective with this is to escape from the fight and relax during that moment of edgy emotions.
3. Put on the headphones and listen to a song. Having headphones or headphones on hand can be another solution. At that moment, change the scream for a song. This will help calm you down.
4. Self-convince themselves that they are children. It seems obvious, but in the moment of absolute tension with the children, we often get on their level and forget that they are children. If we repeat to ourselves many times 'they are children, they are children, they are children ...', we will remember that we must act like adults, in a less visceral way.
5. Speak with a robot voice. Okay, we might want to scream. What if what we do is completely confuse the children by making them laugh before explaining what they are doing wrong? With this, we will be able to powerfully attract their attention, relax the atmosphere and prepare them to be able to explain to them what they should change in their behavior.
6. Run around the house. If what you need is to release tension, nothing better than a run, a few jumps or even a dance. Sport releases endorphins that will counteract the 'anger'.
7. Always carry something orange with us to remind us of the challenge. And for a reason it's called the orange rhino method. Orange, a vital, energetic and warm color at the same time, will help us remember that we have to respect the challenge and not yell at the children. Why a rhino? Because of that thick and hard skin that protects them like a shell? According to the author of this method it is because 'Rhinos are tenacious and vigorous animals that are naturally peaceful, but show aggressive behavior when provoked.'
The author of this orange rhino method offers many other alternatives. Some fun how to speak in a strange language to make children laugh, blow soap bubbles with a pompero or clap until children stop behaving unwantedly ... or more serious alternatives, such as counting to 100, taking a deep breath and trying to control breathing or trying to change the scream to a whisper (this it's quite complicated).
What you will get with all these tips is better channel anger and change response to children in a moment of tension. The author of this method assures that her life has completely changed, she has managed to improve her relationship with her children and with herself without renouncing the norms and limits so essential in the education of children.
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